In June 2000, I came back to the U.S. and prepared for college. This set covers my first three years of college.
40. "God Bless the U.S.A." by Lee Greenwood - In July 2000, I attended a "re-entry seminar" for MKs who were all coming to the U.S. for college after living overseas. We went to Knott's Berry Farm (an amusement park), where they had a patriotic laser and fireworks show for the Fourth. This song played, and as I stood next to the other MKs, I was - perhaps for the first time - actually proud to be an American.
41. "Strangers Like Me" by Phil Collins - As a missionary kid coming "home" to the U.S., I felt like an imposter. This song summed up the experience so well. My best friend Ruth was also an MK, and we both saw ourselves in this film (Tarzan) and loved watching it together.
42. "Hallelujah" by Rufus Wainwright - Sometime during my first two years of college, one of our faculty sang a version of this song in chapel. I didn't know him at the time, I'd never heard the song before, and I was deeply moved. (He later became my favorite prof, and only after I'd taken his class did I find out it was he who had sung in chapel.) I'm now perplexed that they let him sing this in chapel at our Evangelical college.
43. "On My Own" by Samantha Berks - I have never been lucky in love. I get Eponine. I completely get her. Once, while I was studying Anthropology (or was it Geology?) in the hallway with my friend Elisabeth, I started humming this, and she told me she'd sung it in a talent show in high school. I wish I could have heard her sing it! Those first two years of college, I did a lot of walking alone and often sang this to myself as I walked. (The Spotify song is from the film, but this YouTube version is from the 10th anniversary concert, which was actually my first exposure to the show and remains my favorite cast, with Terrence Mann as Javert.)
44. "Where's the Girl?" by Terrence Mann - Speaking of Terrence Mann... I've never seen The Scarlet Pimpernel musical. My friend Megan played this song for me once, and afterward our mutual friend would sing it occasionally. Having not seen the show nor read the book, I'm hazy on the context of the song, but I find it haunting and darkly mesmerizing.
45. "Rise Up, O Men of God" by Heart & Voice - This is the "theme" song of the Wheaton College Men's Glee Club. They started every concert by singing it as they entered the chapel. (Or at least, that's how I remember it.) While I loved all the Wheaton musical groups, especially the Women's Chorale of which I was part my senior year, it was no secret that Glee Club was my favorite. They were treated as kind of a fraternity, which I always found weird and uncomfortable, but their voices were exquisite. (The YouTube version linked here is actually the Men's Glee Club, though not during my time at Wheaton.)
46. "Break in the Cup" by David Wilcox - Halfway through my junior year, I had what you might call a psychological break. I went through a relationship split that led to therapy, and in the fallout from that, I heard the term "codependent" for the very first time. This was life-changing. And as my roommate's David Wilcox CD was the soundtrack for this emotional crisis, this song made me feel seen.
47. "White Flag" by Dido - Recovering from my breakdown took months. I slept a lot. I missed more class than I should have missed. I drove a lot. And I sang this song every time it came on the radio when I drove, putting the volume up as high as it went, belting out the lyrics and sobbing.
48. "Grace" by U2 - My roommate also had the new U2 album, and the first time she played "Grace" for me, I burst into tears. For weeks after my break, she would gently nudge me into sleep at night by playing "Grace" on repeat until I finally drifted off. And this song gave me strength to push through and move on.
This may seem like a weird place to pause, as it was in the middle of my college years. And since I went to a college that had a conservatory of music, there are lots of songs I could add. But "Grace" marks a change in my life, as I picked up the broken pieces and learned to move forward through pain but to let others help me if I needed it. That was a monumental step for me. It's been so many years, and yet I know to this day that if not for my roommate at the time and for my sister doing her darnedest to help me when I was just so dang reluctant to reach out--without them, I literally wouldn't have survived that experience. So here's to Lisa and Heather, true heroes.
No comments:
Post a Comment