Luke came running to the door last night to meet us.
"Hi, Dr. Dennis!" he yelped, giving my husband a huge hug around the legs. I was taken aback.
"Hey, what about me?" I asked. Luke laughed, and then he came to give me a hug.
"Hi, my sister. I love you."
Have I mentioned my baby brother before?
We got Luke when he was a baby, over seven years ago now. Our neighbour called on Thanksgiving to ask if Mom could take care of an abandoned baby boy named Aliyu. Mom said she'd take him after the weekend, and that's how it all began.
Luke was born about February 26, 1999, and was abandoned by his parents at a sort of homeless shelter in town, "House of Hope." He was so developmentally delayed - and small - when we got him in November that year that Dad suspected he was three months old instead of nine! We renamed him Luke a few days after he came to us. Luke has mild cerebral palsy. He couldn't walk until he was about two, and he didn't talk for a long time either. But, as Dad says, "Once he started talking, he just wouldn't stop!"
National law doesn't allow Mom and Dad to adopt Luke (no foreigners can adopt Nigerian children), and the U.S. won't let my parents bring him into the States unless they have legal custody. (Well, who here has heard of such a thing as "legal custody," anyway?) When my parents furloughed in the States in 2003, they had to leave Luke behind for the whole year, with a neighbour missionary family. Luke is eight now, and it looks as though they'll have to do the same again.
People have asked if David and I will take care of Luke while my parents are gone. The answer is, "No." Sure, I'll be a big sister and babysit and visit. But he's an energetic, rambunctious (often troublesome) little guy - full of life - and there's no way I could raise him and still be able to work. Does that make me an ogre? I just think it's best for my new marriage to not have my baby brother thrown into the equation. Call me calloused and hard-hearted, but there it is. I love Luke to pieces, but I can't be the mom that he needs.
The other big thing going on in Luke's life right now is his schooling. He didn't get accepted into first grade at our missionary kid school, Hillcrest, so in the fall he had a tutor who worked on campus with him. That way he got to attend P.E., music, art, and library classes with the 1st graders. In December, his tutor had to return to the States because of a family tragedy, and now Luke hasn't got a school plan. Dad's been teaching him at home in the mornings, but honestly, Daddy needs his time for other things. But what can we do?
**Luke needs a teacher.
**Luke needs to be legally adopted.
And in the meantime, we'll just keep loving him and laughing at his silly stories. (And laughing when we remember his leaving shaving cream in the sink, pulling out all the tissues in the box, smearing lotion all over the new kitten, spilling an airline box full of styrofoam packing popcorn all over the hall floor, or flooding the bathroom by leaving the hand-held shower on... on the bathroom floor!)
Remember Luke and laugh.
I agree with you totally. And boy it takes guts to stand up and put boundries like that. You are Luke's sister, not his mother. And as you well pointed out, a new marriage is really rough anyway.
ReplyDeleteI really hope something can be found for Luke. He sounds like a great kid. It makes me mad that a wonderful little boy is getting treated like a pet, to be left in the country while your parents have to leave. It is so wrong that they can not recognize this little boy needs to be with his parents, the people who have loved and cared for him since the day he came to them.