Losing hope

After all that God had done for us to get us to this point in the process we’re going through with jobs, I was so sure that He would see us through the final round to success. But was I wrong to hope as I did? It’s all out of our hands now. We’ve played all our cards. But there has been nothing yet to suggest we have any hope of succeeding, and the time is almost up for this particular process. The little optimist hiding inside me says that it’s not over quite yet, but each day I wake up thinking maybe this will be the day, and each night I go to sleep weary and confused. Maybe I was wrong, and God is trying to teach us a very difficult lesson: to give up our dreams and trust Him to lead us to something different. But if that’s true, why does my heart wrench each time I think of what could be, and why does all our research into other possibilities end up fruitless? Don’t they say that if God closes a door, He opens a window somewhere else? So if He has closed the door to this future we had hoped and planned on, why hasn’t He opened a window for us? I just don’t understand. I am confused, discouraged, weary, and heart-broken. And I feel very much alone.